So you want to look stylish, mysterious, and slightly unhinged. Good news. This hoodie does all three, I promise. It features the world’s most beloved tooth-challenged sky bandit grinning like he just swapped your aftershave for hot sauce. Shave Cadets will recognize the face. Civilians will simply wonder why you look ten percent smarter for wearing it.

THE OFFICIAL UNOFFICIAL UNOFFICIAL SHAVE CADET HOODIE

(high-strangeness to high-fashion)

THE FEATURES THEY DO NOT WANT YOU TO KNOW ABOUT (do not read)

• 50 percent cotton, 50 percent polyester

• Light Steel blend includes 10 percent black polyester for added mystery

• Fabric weight 9 oz per square yard

• Regular fit that flatters everyone except your enemies

• Set-in sleeves made for dramatic gestures

• Two-ply hood for top secret undercover operations

• Dyed to match drawcord that refuses to clash

• Kangaroo pocket large enough for snacks or contraband

• Heavy rib knit waistband and cuffs that stay put while you look suspicious...in a great way.

• Embroidered C on the left cuff to prove you are wearing a real garment and not a low life imitation...cause who does that?

• Hey You, note...it ships separately!

WHY YOU NEED THIS

• It keeps you warm while plotting or collecting stamps.

• It keeps you comfortable while shaving or collecting stamps.

• It keeps everyone else guessing. Only you collect stamps still.

• It turns any room into your personal hideout. Cool.

SIZE TIP

Size up if you want extra space for gadgets or sandwiches.

Grab one before they vanish into thin air along with your better judgment.